Yet again, I was in need of a retreat to the lush green forest of upstate NY where my lake house resides. Having put aside "me" time, I saw myself becoming lost in the tribulations of everyday life. Small things were noticeably bothering me more than ever, which was the sign that the Costa Rica zen I had once acquired was slowly exiting my body. Becoming aware of this, I quickly scheduled the next trip I could make to retreat and find my truth. Brushing off any existing plans, I knew it was necessary to remember what it once felt like to be at ease. The days were long and the nights longer. New relationships were made between the four young thriving artistic individuals who all needed a getaway and who were all seeking connection in some form. Shakti was present in our body as we sang, painted and fire hooped underneath the brilliantly beautiful stars with the harvest full moon smiling over us. Inspiration was flowing rapidly in the subtle lake current as we sat in the row boat that night and for the first time we found silence. I took in the many sounds the universe was making, which I often forget to listen to. The insects pulsated with the vibrations of our spirits and the lake moaned with appreciation. This moment, I began to notice the sigh of relief I made. It was loud, yet airy and filled with love. It took a few days of serious grounding, but I had finally released a whole lot of something and it felt damn good. Surrounded by my friends and the Earth, I was able to let go of my own judgements, worries, and self doubt. My sigh was waiting for the perfect moment and space to release. I remembered what it was to love again. I am constantly reminding myself.
When I think of love, I often to think of the man who will sweep me off of my feet and take me away to his palace of chocolate and late night conversations with the back round sounds of Frank Sinatra and maybe even a harp. Pure delusion, I'm aware. Don't get me wrong, I absolutely love to get out there, to believe in the unbelievable, but coming back to reality I remember to cherish the love I have within myself, for my family, my friends, the morning birds, and even the tiny little bugs I often wished would not show up on my yoga mat while practicing in the mornings. The warmth love gives us is unquestionable. We flourish and thrive best when we give and receive it. A few days following the lake house getaway, I sighed once again. I must say, it was a nice reminder which took me back to the moment underneath the stars and the importance of the ever so delicate word, feeling, and drug. LOVE.
